Respite

當世界只剩下這床頭燈
你那邊是早晨已經出門
我側身感到你在轉身
無數陌生人正在等下一個綠燈
一再錯身彼此脆弱的時分
如果渴望一個吻的余溫
我關了燈黑暗把我拼吞 

你不在　當我最需要愛　你卻不在 
無盡等待像獨白的難挨 
你不在　高興還是悲哀　你都不在
我受了傷在偷偷好起來　但你不在　不在

時間再按下許多次快門
沈默裏聽見轉動的秒針
一個人吃飯這個淩晨　
孤單一人份　你低聲說你有別人
我的話筒只有自己的體溫
怎樣認真也不一定成真
你說的對　我不得不承認 

是有太多的期待嗎
早上起床看見好多朋友的簡訊和媽媽打的電話
卻少了你關心的一句話 
想很多安慰自己的話

不想要多想不喜歡哭
我也想要好好的

我也想要是很重要的人
回美國之後好像很多事情都變了

had a great day with jenny :) finally got to spend some quality time with my best friend <3 after all these time we now really know how important each other is in our livesss

but i hate not having you with me

i hate not hearing you saying good night before i go to bed, i hate not seeing any message from you when i get home and turn on my laptop, i hate when you don't tell me you miss me, i hate walking on the streets seeing people holding hands, i hate seeing other people kissing, i hate seeing other people in love. i hate that you have classes to go to and i hate that we're so far away from each other.

and i hate being so scared all the time. scared of losing you over stupid things, scared of caring about us so much.

hate picturing how happy we'll be or i'll be if i was with you on my birthday or during this whole vacation.

and i hate not knowing what you're thinking and how you feel.

i only wish things can be easier and i dont miss you as much as i do now.

6373.) I wish, I had the nerve to walk away from you again. But when I did, I came crawling back like an idiot. I can't live without you. Sadly. But you don't want me. You want her. And that's what hurts the most. I can't let go. I love you.

"6320.) I'm scared. Scared because I got so emotionally attached to you and I didn't even realize it until it was too late. I messed up and feelings were lost. But it's not just my fault, it's your fault too. I know how you are, how you play with people's hearts. But even knowing all that, I still feel the way I do about you. I don't want to let you go. I don't want you to tell me the feelings are gone. I don't want to hear about you with her. I still care so much about you and it's going to hurt me to accept things and let you go. Because when I close my eyes all I see is the way you were looking at me that one night, when I hugged you and you said you were sorry for everything having to be this way. "

i just want you to know that there's nothing between us anymore. it is one of the memories that I prefer not to remember not to mention and not to talk about. 

I told you that we can be friends, but the only circumstance of us being friend is you realizing that it's the only option and only possibility. Seeing that ring really tipped me off, how are you supposed to move on with your life if you still had that with you.

I've already moved on and met someone really great in my life, so us, we can only be friends and friends don't do things that you just did. You might think that it was the most romantic thing any one can possibly ever done but you were wrong. I don't just not appreciate it but I despise it so you might as well just quit it and find someone else.

there's just no chemistry anymore and i dont want to hurt you 

just let go and move on. we'll both have better lives without each other.

經過一番努力終於把從來約不到的金小豬小朋友找來家裡了 :)

我們很自食其力的烤餅乾跟蛋糕當下午茶 :)
兩種不一樣的餅乾菜豬勒跟小豬很掙扎很可愛

豬勒說: 高中的同學不是朋友
菜說: 會一起照相的不是朋友
小豬說: 同學都是玩咖

and it just hit me
我們幾個從國中互相扶持一路跌跌撞撞的感情不是一般可以替代
不管家裡什麼事感情起伏成績挫折我們都手牽手走過來
我們散布在不一樣的國家不一樣的學校有著不一樣的人生不一樣的朋友
當我最需要人陪最需要人傾聽的時候轉過身永遠都有你們

逛夜市夜唱夜衝clubbing遊樂園逛街或許都沒有你們
但你們永遠都了解我最需要你們的時候
回國第一個想看到都是你們最後一個看到的也是你們
不管行程多滿schedule多忙永遠都有時間給你們

謝謝你們一直以來這麼了解跟懂我
我們都有很多新的朋友我也認識很多不一樣的人
但你們在我的心中都已經有很重要的位置
在你們面前可以很自然的做自已說想說的話